Where do I start with what I call the best years of my life as a kid? I want to share with all of you what January Embers was to me and what it still means to me today. I apologize for the length of this but I have been working on this for several months in knowing the new "It" movie coming out. What better day to launch some good ole days.

I guess it starts as a group of friends that loved to make music. All of our passions to make it "big" was in the background, but more than anything, it was the show that kept us alive. Music was a very large part in my life and I can truly say is what made me who I am.

Before I get into what January Embers was or what we became I want to start with where we came from. Between Mchenry, Johnsburg, and Spring Grove Illinois, there were bands created before January Embers. These bands are what formed us to what we were and I truly believe the history of those other bands were very important to how January Embers became. Goodbye Matthew was formed by members Mike Heideman, Jake Butler, Austin Schramm, Dave Rigby, and then on a later note myself, Marty Perez. This overall came out as pop punk covers and our extreme joy for bands like Fall Out Boy, Slick Shoes, Brand New, and Taking Back Sunday. Not much came from Goodbye Matthew but the time spent within this band grew our inspiration for music and the interest to do more. Goodbye Matthew didn't last long, I left, and a new singer, Nate, took over and played a battle of the bands at our high school and that was the end for GBM.

A few of us wanted to continue on and begin to write our own stuff, so Jake, Dave, Austin, and I came together and formed the band Paperback Tragedy. We still had covers involved with our set such as songs like Cute Without the E, Cut From the Team and 187.  I have to remind you that this story all is still taking place in high school, and we were just at the beginning of writing songs. Heartbreak Reoccurrence and A Forever Impression were two songs we wrote that come to mind. We had our first stage presence as PBT at a local church in our town. A friend Kyle Ritter played bass standing in for Dave Rigby who shortly left the band. We played one other show with Kyle at a local venue in Spring Grove, Illinois called the cove where we began to change a lot within our music. Tragically, Paperback Tragedy went to the wayside based on issues with each other and high school drama, but hey, that's just high school. Girls, emotions, and music; a cocktail for disaster. Of course we thought it was the best thing in the world.

Now, the most important part of the story, and I hope you're still reading. "Your hair is winter fire, January Embers my heart burns there too." To some these words from a poem within the movie "It" is an iconic note from this movie. The importance to us was much more.

To speed things up a little bit, I'll start with people who contributed to the success of January Embers as band members and more importantly my best friends at the time. Steven Sciazko (bass), Austin Schramm (drums), Jake Butler (guitar/vocals), Matt Muscarello (guitar), and myself Marty Perez (lead singer). Once we became January Embers it felt like we were unstoppable. Some of us were getting older, some of us were having kids in high school, and some of us were still young. As January Embers we won the local battle of the bands at our high school three years in a row.  JE became known as "the band in the McHenry area." We made our band shirts in our graphics class with the support of our teacher Zim, and I can honestly say if you've got one, that's impressive because we just couldn't make enough of 'em.

Screamo: "an aggressive style of emo that emerged in the early 1990s, combining musical intensity with "willfully experimental dissonance and dynamics." ... Screamo is strongly influenced by hardcore punk and characterized by the use of screamed vocals"  - WIKIPEDIA 

We played our hearts out. To many we were known for our stage presence and just overall involvement with the crowd. I can't tell you the feeling I personally had when we would get off the stage and be surrounded by people supporting us, January Embers. We attempted a tour and were

surrounded by issues on top of issues; from a broken down RV also known as "The Brig", to a rock stuck in my eye, I still can say it was one of the best experiences of my life.

I can't say for certain, but I know we minimally had 100 concerts under our belt as JE. From our local roller rink to the scary areas in Michigan, we stood in front of our fans to give them songs they can relate to and a performance they can have fun with.

Remember Your First Everything

We recorded twice. The unfortunate part of our demise as January Embers is that we didn't get to record the songs that we had just finished. It seemed that as years kept growing so did our musical talent and, God, I wish we could have captured that. This Black Market Life was our number one played song found on MySpace and Purevolume, but was followed by a close second, Wings of a Butterfly. I can't help but laugh a little bit just thinking of what social media was like back then.

When Winter Calls

Matt, Jake, Austin, Sisco, and I were like brothers. We wrote songs on the fly and could read each other and say things that just made sense to one another. Our lyrics revolved around love and hatred; with a hint of anything else in between, after all we were still kids. To everyone that heard us and understood what we were saying; the ones that sang along I am most thankful for.

I can remember our last show at the Paradigm Cafe in Round Lake, we had one fan there and he was pointed out multiple times because he was a little different, and alone. After we were done, we all hugged each other, walked off stage, and I was confronted by this individual. This kid told me that we

didn't know him, but he wanted to thank us for being in his life as a band, being that he didn't have much for friends and really looked forward to our music. He was from Rockford, and told me that he had been following us for years. This was one of the saddest/greatest days of my life.

Try Not to Fall

I chose to wait this long to tell the world about January Embers because I know the world doesn't know how much this meant to me. I had also heard of a new "it" coming and what better way to tell the world about January Embers than the day of its new birth. If you grew up in our era and saw the millennium happen, I'm sure you too knew what life was like in a small town. Our friendship was built in those small towns where there's nothing else to really have.

When January Embers died, so did some of our friendships. Even though some of us don't talk, we all still share the times of axing guitars, jumping off of drum sets, or just listening to a new As Cities Burn, Misery Singals or Underoath album together. 

If you made it down here, I want to thank you for your support as a friend and even more as a supporter of January Embers. It was a long time ago, but it's still fresh in my mind. January Embers meant something to us and it is good to know it meant something to you too.

Thank you to some special people/places from back in the day that helped us on our journey.

-For Tomorrow We Die
-The Color Morale (The Killer Apathy)
-Four Letter Lie
-Matt's parents for letting us use the basement
-Chasing Victory
-Pastor Scott
-Suburban Crew
-The Rock n Rack
-The Paradigm Cafe
-The Cove
-Paramount Promotions
-The McHenry Roller Rink
-11th Day
-Dave Toporek
-Brad Smith
-Angelo Dituro
-Close friends and family

Below are some lyrics to our songs that we wrote and I hope you enjoy.

When Winter Calls
I never wanted it to be this way
Can we go back to the start

These words, when you sang my name
Where were you in the end for me?
The oxygen has been dripped away
The oxygen has been dripped away

I never said it would be easy
I never said it would be hard
And it's all my fault
I never wanted it to be this way
Can we go back to the start

I tried so hard to fill the gap that we had between
And I've tried so hard
When winter calls, we'll find away to put the passed behind us
Cuz it's all my fault, it's all my fault

I never said it would be easy
I never said it would be hard
And it's all my fault
I never wanted it to be this way
Can we go back to the start

And to be warm is all I ask from us
Cuz I'm waking up in silk sheets ravaged from your hands

And it' all my fault

For Tomorrow We Die
I'll build you up to bring you down, to bring you down.
We'll go down. This is a memory.
We won't try. Of yesterday.

We all know what this world comes to we all die we all die
But when you're in my arms tonight I could care less
When all my fears fade away I see your face
We'll run away from our shadows misplaced and we won't be coming back

You build your world up to bring me down it crumbles up and falls away
It falls away

You'll go down
You're roses are so beautiful, so young yet so sharp
And yet so sharp

With these walls they will crumble
They fall down
And for tomorrow for tomorrow we die

We try so hard to live this life but for tomorrow, tomorrow we die.

With these walls they will crumble
They fall down
And for tomorrow for tomorrow we die

I gave you everything you wanted now give me a piece of you
I gave you everything you wanted

This One's For You
I could never tell you what this rose means to me in my head has seem to lose its glory.
You took me with the first and I gave you back another.
Your words had more to say than the thoughts of a thousand prayers that would take to a place like heaven.

I never knew that sweet sound of your own voice and those words were like a valentine.
Could take me higher thank those stars that I sought out to reach.

You took me with the first and I gave you back another, gave you back another.
Your words had more to say

Believe me when I say that dreams have never felt so real
Since the night my eyes opened up and an angel was standing there
With wings of pure beauty and a face of solid gold

If I could just spend a moment to concentrate
On this, vision of, pure bliss
I wouldn't ask for another heart beat

I never knew that sweet sound of your own voice and those words like a valentine.
Could take me higher than those stars I sought our to reach.

You took me with the first and I gave you back another your words had more to say than the thoughts of a thousand prayers that would take me to a place like heaven.

Jesus Drives a Buick
This is my last one dying wish
Just close your eyes and drownd yourself

So here's your knife I'm sure you wanted it back
So take it from me take it right from my back
So here's your knife I'm sure you wanted it back
So take it from me take it right from my back

Smash these lives apart and sort out what was ours
What was our closure, our best of things

This can't be the poison that I'm drinking
This can't be the taste of your lips
This can't be the poison that I'm drinking
This can't be the taste of your lips

Do you know what love is
I'll paint the walls with our love or should I paint it with yours
Do you know what love is
Take this as a last goodbye I won't say goodnight
Take this knife from my hand
I'll cut I'll cut so fast my knife will set a flame

I can't replay this
This pain straight through my head
I can't replay this it hurts too much
So I ask myself can there be a better reason
Can there be a better reason

You were flying up while I was falling down
Giving up has never felt so good
And now you're on your own and feeling guilty
Believe me there will be no sympathy

This Black Market Life
We've grown to know that the best is in all of us
Selling our souls to get one more piece from this life
We've scalded our hands to feel one last romance
One more thing to feel better, one more thing to feel better

But when I see these things that buried me,
It's a total system shutdown

You've fallen through the ice now and we're all wondering somehow
Can she be the one that saves me?
I try to reach but the ice blocks my way through

We've sold ourselves for something we don't get with honor,
But a horror that will bring me to this place everyday
Everyday, I could almost see your face

You can't see me
But I see you

When we look deep in us we both see that we're not empty

We were all born with it in our chest and it soon will die with us

Fatal Ending to a Tragic Love Story
Try not to fall. Try not to fall
We'll go so far
For anyone. We'll go, We'll go
Or anything. We'll go so far
Especially. We'll go, We'll go
For me. We'll go so far.
It's a disease. We'll go, We'll go

I'll build this foundation, try not to break

Try not to fall. We'll go so far
For anyone. We'll go, We'll go
Or anything. We'll go so far
Especially. We'll go, We'll go
For me. We'll go so far.
It's a disease. We'll go, We'll go

Try not to fall

Thunderstorms In December 
You could walk with me
If I could only dance with grace, dance with grace
But with only you, we could win this war against mankind
The fingers on our triggers have been hanging for days
But the barrel is aimed straight at me

It'll be ok, we can make it we can win
But don't be afraid to see them coming out out
So aim your aim your guns to the sky, we can make it we can win
This'll only take a second to make thing right. We will make it out

So lift me up. By yourself. Come on stand up straight as you fall behind yourself

Watch me dance with grace

We
We can win this fight
We can win this fight

Dance through the bitter war

We
We can win this fight
We can win this fight

Dance through the bitter war

Remember Your First Everything 
Consequences are falling at your feet and you know it's time
It's time it's time to leave, your heart can't miss a beat
Veins are swelling, heart is rupturing

Your letting her lips cut your wrists
All the languages and she can't speak yours
Talking from the top of the ladder
Her heart is yours

And there isn't a soul in this world that can stop me from screaming
And there isn't a soul in this world. Because I see more

Throw down these arms her face will never die x4

You've trampled on his ghost and you've taken this way too far x2

This child screams
This has just begun

The Sounds You'll Never Hear
Your words have more meaning when your guts are spilled onto the floor
Circled stripes painted on the ceiling tell me what this is good for

Your hatred with my feelings tumbles beneath our feet
Making my eyes wide open again
Making my eyes wide open making my eyes wide open just to ask myself again

Where did I forget what it felt to be alone (come close to me don't let go)
Why can't I forget your whispers into my ear (come close to me don't let go)
And where did I forget and why can't I forget

These contridictions to what I have haven't told me much yet
Sick of fighting sick of crying
Now the tears of drownd and I have myself
You're an enemy not a friend

Where did I forget what it felt to be alone (come close to me don't let go)
Why can't I forget your whispers into my ear (come close to me don't let go)
And where did I forget and why can't I forget

Your sight on life is a never ending darkness your goodbyes give me delight
I can see through this I can see through this
Im torturing myself just show you the way back home

Where did I forget what it felt to be alone (come close to me don't let go)
Why can't I forget your whispers into my ear (come close to me don't let go)
And where did I forget and why can't I forget

My eyes are shut now and your still glistening
With all these endings why couldn't you just hear me?

Other Songs by JE:

*For You
*I Swear its Not Loaded
*Wings Of the Butterfly
*The Brig
*Far From You
*Seven Days